Student Government ticket The Other Option has some thoughts for LSU's current budget crisis under Governor Bobby Jindal.

Let’s cut to the chase on the barbaric budget cuts that “Governor Bobby Jindal” (if that’s his real name) has in store for us spiritually and monetarily broke college kids.  It’s understood that 72% of LSU’s budget for higher education will be obliterated by the upcoming school year. So, let’s brace ourselves for the alleged new changes that will affect our campus and our conscience. 

First, each student will be limited to one scantron and one bluebook per semester. It’s up to that student to make duplicates, so start saving now. Next, select lunches will be offered in the cafeterias AND in the Student Union. Delicacies like PB&J, Macaroni and Cheese (not the name brand kind), and a box combo from Canes (not including a drink) will be served, but there must be at least one other person to share the meal with you. 

Moving on, the “B.Y.O.W” clause, which stands for “Bring Your Own Wifi,” will initiate since the university’s Wifi will be sacrificed to the budget cuts. And last but not least, the suggestion of uniforms has spawned to benefit students from buying new clothes to save money. How thoughtful. 

Now that we know what we’re up against, let’s all make what we have count. But don’t count it for too much since the time to better ourselves intellectually and personally has a price. Thanks Bobby.

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The preceding was a work of satire. Or so we say. That's up to you to decide.